Supercoach 2023 – time to Feed The Machine!

AFL Season 2023 is just about to start which means it’s also time to kick off another massive year of Supercoach, the team picking player wheeling dealing fantasy football game!

How does Supercoach work?

This ever so quick write up about Supercoach is the league version. For the Supercoach single player with the salary cap, best search for that in Google because I’d probably blow all that money on dodgy cars and power tools I’d never use instead of players..

You and a bunch of football loving friends (or Cricket, there’s a version of this for the Big Bash league too) get together to form a league for the year, individually signing up through the official Supercoach website. Before the official season kicks off you have a draft day which you each take it in turns to pick players until all teams are filled and you’re ready for the rest of the year.

As the real life games progress over the season, the players you’ve picked score points on how well they’ve done during that round. Had a worm burning blistering hot like the sun in an oven type of match? Well get set to reap in some big points baby! However if your players get stretchered out due to a kamikaze seagull on the footy field and only score one touch for the game, well that’s not going to reflect well on your score for that week is it?

Just like a real coach, only we don’t get paid and don’t have to answer to anyone if things go bad!

Obviously you want gun players from the get go but you’re not stuck with your original picks if they fail to fire from the outset. The beauty of Supercoach is the trading either through (potentially dodgy) deals with other players or having a root around the free agents list and see who hasn’t be crippled by rabid fans.
Each week it’s you versus another player – beat them in the score challenge and rise in the rankings. Get hammered (in a footy sense) and down, down you go.

But I know nothing of this game AFL, can I play Supercoach still?

Friend, let me tell you that you are definitely not alone in this rather large boat. I too am barely coherent in the language of this sport (I can fumble my way through most footy chat) but after the past two years of trying this Supercoach challenge, I found it hilarious fun and a great way to bond with the people you work with.
No seriously, it’s like Netflix’s Drive to Survive – before that series I had a milder than milder interest in anything Formula One related, and now I love it. Before Supercoach, I couldn’t pick any given player out of a lineup.
…I still can’t do that after not one, but two busy years so far but wowee have I enjoyed playing this game and the inner office rivalries that have broken out. Which is why I couldn’t wait for Supercoach 2023 to finally roll around again.
Give it a crack, you might become a stats fanatic like I am.

Today is Supercoach Sunday draft day

And it was a day I was so looking forward to because we had everything good to go. Like draft day last year we were ready to converge on Coach Brandon’s house with pizzas and beers on standby, laptops open and phones fully charged with the apps locked and loaded ready to duke it out for the players we want.
There’d be oohs and ahhs, cheers and threats and good times had by all. Which I’m sure there will be for everyone else, because I’m a late omission.

Part of last years festivities

My wife Donna had to work today and between that and no babysitter handy for a stroppy 11 year old (he’s in a crap of a mood today for some reason) and my daughter, well I’m home bound pretty much. But I’ve got some food withing reach, plenty of water on tap (I need a clear head to pick the best team obviously) and this computer ready to wheel and deal.
Wish me luck, because like the last two years, I’m going to need it!

Supercoach 2023 – meet the league players (aka coaches)!

From 8 last year to 12 in season 2023, here’s who’s battling it for the cyber cup this year! (And if you’re short on Supercoach team name ideas, maybe these will help!)

Supercoach 2023 Supercoach team name ideas

Matt’s Crows – According to Matt the greatest team of all time in the Australian Football League are the Adelaide Crows so we expect him to pick heavily from any and all available Crow’s players. At the last pizza and beer draft day he bugged out halfway through because ‘I’ve got to go to the shops’ and left the system to autopick and fill the rest of the spots. This move created the ‘I’ve got to go to the shops’ inside joke that will probably never die.

Tigs 2023 Premiers – There’s quite a few Richmond Tigers fans in this mob including myself and being the second coach to pick from the draft, I expect Maddy to nab the highest ranking Tiger available before anyone else (which is Nick Vlastuin DEF ranked 45 on the list.) She’s also the only female coach we’ve ever had and is very keen to put the rest of us boys in our place.

Boxing is better – Hence the name, Brad is very proactive in the local boxing community and I have no idea how he’s going to go picking players who aren’t trying to belt seven shades of snot out of each other in 12 rounds. Still, we welcome him to this league for the first time and hope he does well, but not better than me obviously.

Frownyjr – Tiger fan number 2 and potentially knows a lot more about the team then any other Richmond supporter listed here. With more than just a passing knowledge, this new coach could be a pretty decent threat, time will tell.

One man brand – Cats obsessed, draft day last year wouldn’t have been half the fun it was had Brandy not offered to host it at his house. A very focused coach (just ask him), he’ll be a strong challenger once again especially if he picks gun Geelong players again.

Purple Drapes – Two years back Tim came to me and said ‘Hey Al, would you like to be part of the office Supercoach this year?’ which means it’s his fault I’m addicted to this rubbish. Footy mad, he won the first season two years ago and was one hell of a challenger last year so we expect quite the fight from him this time around.

Tip Doggy Dog – To his credit, Guy tries. Unfortunately you just have to remind him to try because more often than not last year he’d forget to put a team in or sub injured players out. Still, we can’t all be champions.

Lethal Lemurs – Last year Leigh’s team were the Lobsters, now he’s moved to Lemurs. I can only imagine that with this trend, 2024 will be all about the Leprechauns. A gun in the newsroom and pretty sharp at Supercoach, he’s one to watch.

Crippto Currency – Potentially a tigers fan too (I’ll have to check). Once tried to engage me with in depth AFL chat only to find out it would be easier to explain complex economics to a brick wall. Seems knowledgeable, possible threat.


Feed the machine! – Hey that’s me! Here for the fun of things (and the blogging opportunity) this year I’m not playing favourites in selecting players (unless it’s Marcus Bontempelli in the picture above who did so well for me last year). If I’m not languishing down the bottom of the ladder then I’m having a great year (we’ll see.) Team name came from this unbelievable track I discovered earlier this year.
We’ve got this, let’s do it!

Collective Mind – The other half of the news room with Leigh, I know very little about his footy prowess (I know he’s an F1 fan like me though.) Could surprise us all and then wander off to talk about the weather in the 8:30am news update. Good luck Andrew!

And finally..

Tysonic Hedgehogs – Now this is interesting. Last years Supercoach winner is now last in team selection (which hilariously was decided by a horse race of all things) which means the first 11 in the league picks before Tyson does*. Can he still manage to scrape together something decent with a lot of the good picks disappearing before his very eyes? Nothing like upping the stakes to make things harder for a champion!

*Draft order in our Supercoach is in snake mode which means instead of starting at 1 to 12 and then back at one again, it goes 1 to 12, then 11, 10, 9, 8 etc – up and down like a snake. Which means for me, I get pick 10 and then the next one at pick 14 and so on…

So there’s the coaches, coming up next we meet the team. Who made the cut for Feed The Machine? (or more importantly, who was left to pick from when I finally got a turn?) That update is now ready to check out right here!

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